Y R People Messing with the Natural Order?

It's a question us regular people have been asking ourselves since the dawn of the the 21st Century....Y R People Messing with the Natural Order? Biologists who study society and culture know what I am talking about. Most people in America are heterosexual. They mate just like other mammals and procreate. It's true people in America have sex for fun to, but the main purpose as Freud put it, is to make babies. In civilization, most people with children are married or were married, though many children are also born out of wedlock. Since the dawn of the late 20th Century, organizations like Planned Parenthood have been trying to get people to plan the parenting process. But there are those in society who are opposed to this principle and like to mock people who seek to be responsible in their sexual habits (sometimes calling them "gay"). Many cling to ideas such as people should not have sex out of wedlock, an idea that is so out of sinqe with the times that is positively retrograde. Rather than promote responsible sexual conduct (such as the use of condoms and the like) they want to return to an earlier Victorian period where sex out of wedlock was banned. Well, call me crazy but I think chastity belts are a thing of the past. Plus there are those who also want to turn the clock back to a period of gay bashing. Now mind you, most people in America are straight, and might even find gay sex a little weird, but that doesn't make them bigots who approve of gay bashing. Biologists know that there always seems to be a small percentage of the population that is either sterile or gay. But let's face the facts, most males and females mate with members of the opposite sex. I did, most everybody I know did. And the main reason, you ask, because we ultimately wanted to have a family like ones we were leaving at 18. Now some of my friends are again single or divorced, but that didn't mean that we didn't want to stay with our mates---we did. Being a mainly one woman man, I found being single at 42 somewhat ackward and difficult. I don't have any kids because I exercised birth control, a decision I might ultimately regret, but I am happy that I was responsible in my sexual habits and didn't go around dropping babies all over God's creation. Still lately there seems to be an attack on the responsible sexual habits of myself and other Generation X-ers. It seems that today there are an awful lot of attacks on those of us who are again single in our forties. Now biologists know that any male the age of 42 is not only old enough to be a father but a grandfather. Oh I know Steve Colbert and Jon Stewart look like father's with their dyed hair and school-boy antics, but they too are Gen X-ers and old enough to be grampa too....and so is the president. You see kiddies biologists and psychoanalysts know that most people can make a baby at 14 years old, no matter what the US government says. Just cause Uncle Sam says 18 is the legal age of adulthood, doesn't mean that you can't make a baby before that. And in the natural God-given order that means that you are also old enough to take care of them....Hey if the squirrels in the yard can do it, so can people. Now legal ages for adulthood alter this a bit and complicate things, and largely because they mess with the natural order of things. Now I personally like the fact that the legal age for adulthood is 18, but that is only because I am civilized; if I had lived in the jungles of the Amazon, I would have probably been a father at 15, in which I would be bordering on great grampa by now. Just because we live in a geriatric society doesn't mean that 70 year olds are gramma, they aren't, they are great, great, great gramma. And you know old people, they live in the past. Now me personally, I was with a woman for 14 years, and haven't been on the dating scene since the late 1980s, so I am a little rusty on how to meet women, and I don't trust Internet dating either. (Just a little note kiddies, that doesn't make me "gay," just a single "grampa.") And there are a lot of us out there. So for all you dumbasses out there who think single people in their 40s are gay...GROW UP! Quit attacking people who believe in true love and exercise responsible sexuality like civilized people. We were once like you , you know, looking for love and trying to found our families too. Quit attacking responsible people (democrats or republicans) who believe in the concept of family. AND QUIT DYING YOUR HAIR STEVEN COLBERT, WE KNOW YOU ARE IN YOUR FORTIES LIKE US GRAMPA!

That is why we keep asking ourselves, Y R People Messing with the Natural Order?

Eric Forman: Today's Tom Sawyer

Back in the day when we were in English class we used to read these things called books. I know that sounds strange to kids of today, but it was required by law that we go to school, and that included English class. Back then we read authors like Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens really) and books about protypical American boys like Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn. At the time , we thought it was just a story like the one's we told our friends and didn't really think about it in terms of reputation and money. At the same time we watched other All -American guys on TV, like little Opie from the Andy Griffith Show and Richie Cunningham from Happy Days. We figured that was TV's version of the 50's and 60's Tom Sawyer. Back then we didn't realize it but, as it turned out, we were the Eric Forman's of the late 70's and early 80's. Mind you we watched TV every Tuesday wondering what Richie and Fonzie would be up to this week (provided it wasn't a re-run), just like kids today watch Everybody Hates Chris or re-runs of "That 70's Show." It is true, that we knew that we were kinda the Richie Cunningham's of the 70's and 80's but we figured that was as American as Apple Pie. Little did we know what challenges would face "Apple Pie" in the future. Now remember kids, Hollywood is a money-making industry focused on profit, if it sells they keep it on and they make money. The same was true for Mark Twain, who profited more from the stories about Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn than the real Tow Sawyer's probably ever did. Heck, they even gave Twain an honorary doctorate. It seems that in America if you write about the Tom Sawyer's, Richie Cunnignham's, and Eric Forman's of America, then you get all the honors, and usually, all the dough. Same goes for the actor's that play them. Now us real Tom Sawyer's , Richie Cunningham's, and Eric Forman's are still out there, but now we are all grown up, but, with an economy in shambles,we are struggling and are left wondering, does America still like us? And if so why not? All of those shows were hits and made dough for Hollywood, but a broken economy and lingering world conflicts, have left the real Tom's and Richie's and Eric's out in the cold. This is despite all our education and achievements (I personally have a Ph.D.). So the next time, you find yourself worshipping Mark Twain, Topher Grace, Ron Howard, or some other rich guy for playing a or writing about a character in Hollywood, remember that they wouldn't be able to make all that money if we weren't out there living our lives every single day of the week. Maybe instead of worshipping the Hollywood millionaires, you should show a little respect to the real Richie's, Tom's, Huck's, and Eric's of the world...You never know, they might just live next door and be in their 40's by now.

And that is why we keep asking, Y R People Messing with All Americans?

Spirituality to All Americans

I know what you are thinking, what does this site have to do with spirituality? Isn't it a satirical rant against all that is absurd? Yes, sometimes it is, but us All Americans know when to be serious too. Speaking as a person who has had a number of close scrapes with death, back in 1999, and again in 2001, I know the meaning of spirituality. I know people scoff at "near death" experiences, and frankly so did I, until it happened to me. I know what you are thinking, I saw "Ghost" with Whoopi Goldberg, I thought it was all fiction, and at the time I thought the same thing....though I did like the movie (well at least at the time). But it seems that near death experiences might actually be real. I had one...now mind you I don't know if it was real or I was just outta it like Abbott and Costello when they were in the desert, but it did change my perspective on God and Jesus a bit. Now I'm a Christian and you know what they say, when you are about to go to Heaven you see Jesus. Of course people like Freud, say that is all bunk and being a Freudian in my youth, I believed him, but then again, Freud was never on the operating table at a hospital like I was. Without bullsh*ting you I will say that being near death does change your perspective. After my near death experience I decided to try to, as Spike Lee says it, "Do the Right Thing." I fought for civil rights, contributed money to charities, published books, and produced albums at my own personal expense. I shared my creations with the world, and they are substantial (25 albums--more than Elvis, 3 books, 4 chapter length articles, and 3 portfolios of original artwork). Now mind you this is more than I ever thought I would be able to do when I was a kid of 14, so naturally I am very proud. Likewise, I gave up the greedy pursuit of monetary wealth. Now mind you I know All Americans are hard working people and deserve to get paid, but if my near death experience taught me anything it is that a person's value can not be measured in monetary wealth alone. I mean really, when I was growing up we reveled in the fact that Bruce Jenner won the decathalon and the US Hockey team beat the Russians, and none of them got paid for it. So when you think that wealth means everything, remember me....I have a PH.D., 3 books, four chapter articles, 25 albums, and some of the best friends this world has ever seen.

That is why we keep asking the question: Y R People Messing with All Americans

Homophobia: The Curse of the New Age

It seems that since the dawn of the 21st Century, homophobia and homophobic comedians have become the order of the day. In my humble opinion, there hasn't been this much gay-bashing in the media since the 1980's. If I hear one more joke about San Francisco I think I will puke. First it was Adam Sandler with his gay-bashing homophobe movie and then Jon Stewart and his masterbation humor. It is interesting how dear old Jon has changed his tune. Back in the the liberal Clintonian 90's he was talking about his masterbatory tendencies on his Comedy Central specials, only to turn around in the 21st Century and start a whole new gay bashing revolution. Jon, you make me sick. For those of us who have had Gay friends, we are grossly offended by your bigotry. Don't you remember Jon, and Ellen for that matter, that the Nazis put so called "f*gs" in the ovens with the Jews! Oh, I know Jon that you have Anglicized your real name from Liebowitz to Stewart so that people wouldn't know that you were Jewish, but lets face it Jon, if you lived in Nazi Germany they would have fried you like a fried green potato, despite your fake name. So get with the program comedians, it is the 21st Century not the 1800s and your f*g jokes are rapidly going out of style. Same goes for you, politicians who all seem to think that you are living in England 200 years ago, and can use your freedom of speech to slander people.